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**TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of miscarriage**
But you already knew that. I started my Instagram account for this blog when I was newly pregnant with baby #2 and I decided from the get go that I would be open and share my pregnancy along with any updates whatever that path was. We’re grateful to have a very healthy baby growing, and we anticipate the rest of the pregnancy to be the same barring any unforeseen circumstances.
Okay, on to the stuff you really came here for: a first trimester recap via FAQs!
Q: How did you and your husband know you were ready for baby #2?
We had always known that we wanted our kids to be close together. My husband is about 4 years older than his younger brother, and I am about 3 years older than my younger brother, and we both agreed that we wanted our kids to be closer in age and grades in school. We like the idea of going through all of the same phases relatively close together as parents, and we wanted our kids to have the experience of being at the same school as their sibling(s) for more time than what we both experienced. We had originally talked about trying for baby #2 when Bruce was around a year old, but a few months earlier than that I was getting MAJOR baby fever, and we decided why not?
Q: How long did it take you to get pregnant?
It took us awhile. We started trying when Bruce was 9 months old (in March 2019), and got pregnant 10 months later (in December 2019). This really threw me for a loop, because we got pregnant with Bruce while I was on birth control, so I hadn’t experienced going through trying for a baby before, and I certainly wasn’t prepared for the experience of having some trouble with it.
Unfortunately, we discovered the pregnancy was ectopic in January 2020 (should have known this year was going to be off!), and I subsequently miscarried.
We decided to just let things be, and focus on me having a regular cycle again in February. We weren’t trying per say, but we also weren’t preventing. And as luck would have it, I got pregnant! We officially found out I was pregnant in March 2020, 1 year after we started trying.
Now, we’ll never know why it took so long for us to get pregnant after we started trying. I had an IUD after Bruce, and I got it removed the month we started trying. Did it have anything to do with anything? Again, we can’t say for sure, and we’ll never know, but I have a hard time believing it didn’t have ANY impact on my body, hormones, and ability to conceive. If I’m speaking candidly, I almost think that the ectopic pregnancy was my body’s way of flushing out any lasting effects that the IUD hormones were having on my body. Please remember, this is not medically backed at all, and not necessarily a theory supported by my doctor, but this is my personal intuition after our experience.
Q: Will you find out the gender?
Yes, and we have! We’re so excited to have a baby girl on the way. You can see our gender announcement on Instagram here.
I will say, we did an at home blood test from the company called Sneak Peek to find out the gender early (you can do it as early as 8 weeks), but unfortunately I can’t recommend it because the results were wrong for us. There is a chance the results were contaminated, but I’m not sure I could have done anything more besides swim in bleach to make sure all of the surfaces and tools I was using were clean!
Q: Has this pregnancy been different than your first?
Yes. If I had to sum it up with one word, it would be “oof”. I’m not sure if it has been harder because I am also running around after a two year-old, or if it actually is, but it has just been harder.
Being pregnant during a pandemic been a blessing and a curse I will say, because in the beginning of my pregnancy the whole quarantine thing made it a LOT easier to not have to worry about what I would say while we still didn’t want to share – we weren’t going anywhere and/or interacting with many people socially, including family. We told our parents pretty soon after we found out, and gradually told siblings and grandparents after that, but all well before 12 weeks (not that we were waiting for that milestone, but that is typically when folks wait until to be comfortable sharing because most of your risk of miscarriage is behind you at that point).
The curse part of all of was when daycare closed for a month and I was in full first-trimester exhaustion mode and frequently getting migraines while having my 2 year old son home full-time. It was ROUGH. There was a lot more TV and junk meals than I’d like to admit, but we just embraced it and rolled with the punches.
Also, I was furloughed and subsequently laid off due to COVID during this time, so it has been a completely different experience for me in that I haven’t been working and trying to balance pregnancy with that. Again, nice to not have to consciously “hide” it from work, but it also has meant I’ve been acutely aware that I’m pregnant at all times vs. getting the (sometimes) welcome distraction of work.
Q: Did you experience any nausea or morning sickness?
Luckily, I am part of the 20% of women who don’t experience pregnancy related nausea (I didn’t with Bruce either). That being said, I am part of the group of women who DO experience pregnancy headaches and migraines. To be honest, I’m not sure which is worse!
Q: Are there any “things” that you couldn’t live without during your first trimester?
Aside from extra strength Tylenol (a.k.a., the only medication I could use for migraines), I pretty much always had a giant hydro flask of water (I like this one with the straw lid) and this jade roller cooled and ready to go for instant headache relief.
Q: Do you have any specific cravings?
Just like I did with Bruce, I cannot say no to anything sweet. I seriously thought about donuts and cinnamon rolls constantly, when normally I am a savory girl through and through. My husband loves it though, because he has such a sweet tooth and is thrilled that I can’t say no to his late night treat runs!
So there you have it, a recap of my first trimester the second time around. How did your second (or third, or fourth, etc.!) pregnancy differ from your first pregnancy? I’d love to know in the comments!